Becoming parents is bound to change your life, and your relationship with your partner, especially in the bedroom. Giving birth to a child is not an easy process, irrespective of whether you have had a vaginal delivery or a caesarean delivery. A caesarean or a C-section can be classified as a major abdominal surgery and your body needs adequate time to recover.

While you heal from your C-section, you may not be thinking about getting intimate with your partner yet – and that is perfectly normal. However, as you gradually begin to resume your daily activities, you may be wondering when you can have sex after a C-section. It’s important to remember that no two bodies are the same, and the time you take to recover could be different from that of others. Similarly, each couple is unique as well. How long you should wait before having sex again really depends on you, and how well you’re coping with the changes in your life.

This article explains when you can resume sexual activities after a C-section, what you can expect, precautionary measures to take and tips for a better sex life after the surgery.

Recovering After A C-Section

A caesarean is a kind of surgical procedure where a baby is delivered through an incision made in the parent’s uterus. According to the World Health Organisation (WHO), C-sections are increasingly becoming more popular and now account for about one in five childbirths globally.

Barring complications, you may be required to stay in the hospital after your C-section for two to three days. Since this is a major surgery, it is recommended that you ease back into your daily activities. Most doctors advise new mothers against lifting anything heavy for a few weeks after the C-section. This is mostly because your abdominal muscles need time to heal from the wound, even if the incision appears to have healed. In fact, you may expect decreased mobility and some mild cramps in your abdomen in the first few days or weeks after giving birth.

Also read: When Can We Resume Sex After Baby? – Know What Precautions To Take

It is also normal to experience vaginal discharge or bleeding after birth; usually, that lasts for four to six weeks. Contrary to what you may see in movies, it takes a few weeks for the uterus to go back to its usual size; as your uterus contracts, you’ll notice your belly going back gradually to what it was before you got pregnant. During this time, your cervix begins to close back up. Medical practitioners recommend waiting for the cervix to go back to normal before you can resume sexual activities.

While on an average, you can expect your incision and your abdomen to have healed in six weeks, it may take longer as well. Numbness or tingling sensations and even mild pain around the site of the incision are perfectly normal for up to six months after the delivery.

When Is It Safe To Have Sex After A C-Section?

According to research, it is advisable to avoid placing anything in the vagina for at least six weeks after the C-section. This includes having penetrative sex.

You can resume sexual activities once your incision has healed, and your cervix has closed up. This can easily be confirmed by your doctor during your postnatal check-up. Since your incision may still be sore six weeks later, you can try sexual positions which don’t exert undue pressure on your abdomen and make you and your partner feel comfortable instead.

However, it is crucial to note that the timeline mentioned above only applies if you didn’t face complications after your C-section. As with any major surgery, a caesarean delivery too carries certain risks which may further increase recovery time. In such cases, you may have to wait for about eight weeks before you try vaginal sex.

Indulging in sex before it is safe to do so may result in vaginal bleeding, pain at the incision site, vaginal dryness and other issues which may make the experience far less enjoyable than it should be. Having sex before your incision heals may also cause it to reopen; that is precisely why some precautions are necessary the first time you do it after birth.

What Should You Expect?

Your doctor’s approval does not have to mean that you should have sex before you or your partner are ready to. Having a new baby in your life can be exhausting, and getting a good night’s sleep might seem more tempting than having sex. And that’s okay.

In fact, studies have shown that a significant number of new parents have reported sexual challenges after a C-section. It is common to experience a lack of libido or sexual desire after the delivery which is exacerbated by lower levels of oestrogen in the body and physical changes in your body. Hormonal changes can also affect the natural lubricants in the vagina, making it drier than usual. Many women have also reported pain while having sex or after it. This is called dyspareunia.

If you are breastfeeding, this could further lower the levels of oestrogen in your body, resulting in vaginal dryness and affecting your ability to have an orgasm.

As you begin to start thinking about sex after your C-section, you need to set your expectations straight, especially for the first time. At first, it may feel uncomfortable and not as pleasurable as you remember it to be. But it’s vital to be patient, and give your body and mind the time it needs as it adapts to the changes.

Precautions While Having Sex After a C-section

The first time you have sex after a C-section can be a little scary – you’re not sure how you will feel or whether it will hurt.

While mild pain or cramping during sex or after sex can be expected, you should seek medical help if you experience unbearable pain in your vagina, pelvic area or abdomen. Similarly, you should watch out for:

• Excessive vaginal bleeding or large clots
• Swelling around your incision
•  Bleeding from the incision
• Leaky urine
• Pain while urinating
• Foul smelling discharge after sex
• Fever
• Vomiting or nausea

Tips For Better Sex After Your Delivery

1.      Have a conversation with your partner

You need to talk to your partner about how you are feeling. While you may have received the go-ahead from your doctor, it may be quite some time before you feel ready and comfortable enough to have sex again. Shutting up about it and not being honest about how you feel could lead to miscommunication between partners.

When you do begin to have sex again, it is important to talk about what you like and what you dislike. Things are going to change after your C-section, and your preferences in bed too may change. As you begin to experiment with what you’re both comfortable with, it’s going to be like rediscovering yourselves once again.

2.      Experiment with sex positions

This is a great opportunity for you and your partner to experiment with sex positions, even ones you haven’t tried before. You’ll discover that some sex positions are more comfortable than others, and cause less discomfort and pain in the incision area. For instance, you may find it a little difficult to have sex in the missionary style at first. Similarly, sex in the doggy style can be tricky for some too; it exerts extra pressure on your core and your pelvic region, whichPositions where you will be on top or even reverse cowgirl and side-lying may be more preferable in the initial days.

3.      Use a lubricant

Hormonal changes in your body after a C-section can result in vaginal dryness, affecting the natural lubrication present in your body. There’s no shame in using an external lubricant; in fact, it makes sex even more pleasurable and longer lasting for both you and your partner. Water-based lubricants are advisable because they do not affect the pH levels of your vagina and are less likely to cause irritation.

4.      Explore non-penetrative sex

Making sex pleasurable after a C-section is more than just the positions you try. It’s about having a partner who will pay heed to your needs and your physical comfort. There are many ways to get intimate without having penetrative sex. Clitoral stimulation, oral sex, masturbating together or a sensual massage – these are some of the non-penetrative forms of sex you can try.

Cuddling, spooning and simply spending quality time together are important as well. These can make you feel closer to your partner and help you rediscover your passion after childbirth.

5.      Try kegel exercises

It is a common misconception that kegel exercises are beneficial only after vaginal delivery. These exercises can help even after a C-section in strengthening your core and abdominal muscles and speeding up the recovery process.

The abdominal region and the pelvic floor as a whole are connected by some muscles called the fascia. The kegel exercises help in strengthening these muscles. There are two ways to do it – by sitting or by standing, and both methods are just as effective.

In both cases, you will have to forcefully contract the muscles in your pelvic floor; it should feel like you are trying to hold back your urine. Now, hold, for as long as you possibly can. Try to hold the position for at least five seconds; as your muscles grow stronger, you will be able to hold for longer.

There’s no limit on the number of times you can do these exercises in a day. Do it as many times as possible and whenever you get time.

6.      Use birth control

If getting pregnant almost immediately after your C-section is not on the cards, the importance of this tip cannot be ignored. Yes, it is very much possible to get pregnant a month or two after childbirth, even if you are breastfeeding.

Use any form of birth control you like – condoms or other barriers, female condoms (once it is safe to insert into your vagina) and there are also forms of hormonal birth control that are safe to use while breastfeeding. Seek medical opinion before using hormonal birth control.

7.      Be kind to yourself

Most importantly, be kind to yourself and your partner and take it slow. The only right time to have sex after a C-section is when you are comfortable and ready, of course, after your surgical wound has healed. If you’re feeling the urge to jump back into bed even after six weeks, there’s no need to feel inadequate or anxious. Listen to your body. Rushing into it could leave a bitter taste and may not be a pleasant experience for the two of you.

Sex after a C-section can be enjoyable, but you must learn how to listen to your body and take it easy. Please remember, there is no right time to start having sex after your delivery; the right time is when you and your partner are comfortable. Typically, it is medically safe to have sex six weeks after a C-section, but really, it depends on how long it takes for your incision and abdomen to heal after the surgery.

As you think about getting intimate with your partner, sit down and have a conversation with them about your inhibitions, fears, your preferences and so on. Being open with your partner can make the experience all the more enjoyable.

Frequently Asked Questions

1.       How long does it take to heal after a C-section delivery?

It can take up to six weeks. If you had complications during the surgery, it can take longer.

2.       What can you expect as you recover from C-section?

Some abdominal discomfort and mild cramps are expected after your surgery, as your muscles and the incision heal. You may also experience some mild bleeding for six weeks after birth.

3.       What happens if you have sex before it is safe?

Trying to have sex before your incision has healed can result in vaginal pain, bleeding and even put you at risk for infection.

4.       Why is sex sometimes painful after a C-section?

Your abdominal muscles and your pelvic floor can remain sore for a while after surgery. This is why you may experience some pain during or after you have sex. It could also be due to vaginal dryness or hypertonicity, which is a condition of your pelvic floor.

Sources

·         Cesarean birth after care. (2015, August): http://americanpregnancy.org/labor-and-birth/cesarean-aftercare/

·         McDonald, E. A., & Brown, S. J. (2013, February 27). Does method of birth make a difference to when women resume sex after childbirth? British Journal of Obstetrics and Gynaecology, 120(7), 823–830

·         Sex and contraception after birth. (2016, February 5): https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/pregnancy-and-baby/sex-contraception-after-birth/

·         Caesarean section rates continue to rise, amid growing inequalities in access (2021, June): https://www.who.int/news/item/16-06-2021-caesarean-section-rates-continue-to-rise-amid-growing-inequalities-in-access#:~:text=Rising%20rates%20suggest%20increasing%20numbers%20of%20medically%20unnecessary%2C%20potentially%20harmful%20procedures&text=According%20to%20new%20research%20from,21%25)%20of%20all%20childbirths.

·         Amiri, F. N., Omidvar, S., Bakhtiari, A., & Hajiahmadi, M. (2017). Female sexual outcomes in primiparous women after vaginal delivery and cesarean section. African health sciences, 17(3), 623-631.

·         Hantoushzadeh, S., Shariat, M. A. M. A. K., Rahimi Foroushani, A., Ramezanzadeh, F., & Masoumi, M. (2009). Sexual satisfaction after child birth: vaginal versus elective cesarean delivery. Tehran University Medical Journal, 67(1).

·         Leeman, L. M., & Rogers, R. G. (2012). Sex after childbirth: postpartum sexual function. Obstetrics & Gynecology, 119(3), 647-655.