What is Discord and Is it Safe for your Child

As children found themselves confined indoors during the pandemic, online gaming emerged as a primary source of entertainment, leading to increased usage of online gaming platforms. As such, Discord emerged as one of the most popular platforms among young people. Discord is an online platform that connects gamers together in a controlled and isolated online space, which is almost impossible to find for someone who’s not there in that space already. One can create an alias and be never discovered by onlookers if they chose not to. Children have spent days and nights on online gaming, and streaming, making Discord the most popular platform to connect, chat, and build communities while playing online. 

As a parent, it is your business to know and be aware of potential risks that may hamper the safety of your child on Discord like online gaming platforms. In this blog, you will know what discord is in detail, why it is popular among children, safety concerns as per fellow parents and experts, and what you can do to ensure your child’s safety. 

It was a relaxed Sunday morning and Rashi was calling for her 9-year-old to come for breakfast. “Ruh! Daddy and I will finish the mango shake….it’s so yummy”. When Ruh still did not respond, Rashi went to Ruh’s room to find her with her buddy, her iPad. Ruh was in her extremely focused avatar playing her favorite Roblox. Ruh also plays Fortnite on Discord. “Mamma, 5 minutes more.” Rashi sat there by Ruh’s side to see her play and also to see some chat messages on the side about some random things, right from what is the trick to the game to how is the newly opened go-karting place to more random things and then she discovered a comment with a sexual undertone. Ruh wasn’t looking at any of it as she was in her extreme focus mode. Rashi knew that Ruh would take longer and so she went inside to get breakfast for Ruh. Ruh continued to play on Discord. And meanwhile, Rashi and Soumil went out and got some home chores done. While on their way back, they shared their worry about what Rashi saw on Ruh’s screen and how they should tackle it. They were back in a couple of hours and they were not wrong in expecting Ruh to be still in her room on her iPad. Soumil and Rashi have been noticing this pattern for the last 3 months and have tried talking Ruh out of Discord & Roblox. When that didn’t work, they made a pact on the number of hours she will get on Discord.

For starters, if you don’t know this already, it’s definitely your business to know as a parent about both, Roblox and Discord. Roblox is an online game where you can create your avatar and other things. Discord is a platform where you can communicate with others from around the world. Let’s say that they want to create an avatar in Roblox and want to play with people on Discord, they would go to the website of Roblox or Discord and find someone to set up a chat room with. It’s very easy to find people who share your interest.

In a recent survey on Parentune, We asked parents a question,

What would you say should be the minimum age for using online gaming platforms like Discord & Roblox?

• 8 years+
• 10 years+
• 12 years+
• 14 years+

*Source: Parentune survey 2023 and 2022 

1600+ Parents responded and 61% of parents would prefer the minimum age to be 14 years. But, on the other hand, more than 60% of the children start playing these games even before they are 10 years of age*.

We would be focusing on Discord in this blog, and we shall share the inherent risks and concern areas for parents. These are a must-know for each parent to know and aspects which, each parent should be able to protect their child from. 

Understanding Discord:

Discord is a free voice, video, and text communication platform designed for creating communities. It allows users to join or create servers, which act as virtual spaces for people to gather and interact based on shared interests. Discord is particularly popular among gamers, as it offers features such as voice channels, chat rooms, and screen sharing, making it easy for gamers to communicate and coordinate while playing.

Why is Discord so popular among adolescents, tweens, and teens

Discord has gained in popularity due to several factors such as:

1. Gaming Communities: Discord gained traction initially within the gaming community, and it continues to be a popular platform for gamers of all ages. It provides a seamless voice chat feature, allowing gamers to communicate and coordinate in real-time while playing together. 

2. Customization and Personalization: Discord offers a high degree of customization, allowing users to personalize their profiles, avatars, and server themes. Young users enjoy expressing their individuality and creativity through these customizable features. They can create and join servers dedicated to their favorite games, interests, or fandoms. 18-year-old Ankur says, “ I have been using Discord since I was 14 years old. My gamer friend introduced me to this app and Discord is a little complex to use but once you are familiar you will enjoy being on it”. Basically, with Discord, you are free to be anyone, and nobody can find you if you don’t want them to. You can create a server space for yourself or could join one such space created by someone else. Imagine being in a space that can’t be found by anyone else, which has no address and nobody would know where are you, and even if someone lands in that space, they won’t be able to know who are you. 

3. Multi-Functionality: Discord provides a wide range of features such as video calling, screen sharing, file sharing, and the ability to connect with others. This makes Discord very easy to use as a single space, from your personal and secret space. Although Discord is popular for gaming you can have more features like studying, connecting with different people, and building communities or creating private groups. It can be used as one intends to. This versatility makes Discord a popular platform for various online activities, including gaming, studying, socializing, and content creation. 

4. Easy Accessibility: Discord is accessible across multiple devices, including desktop computers, laptops, smartphones, and tablets. Its availability on different platforms and operating systems allows young users to stay connected and engaged with their communities at all times. This means that a Discord user would always be able to keep a tab on others in the community and vice versa. 

5. Community Building and Interaction: Discord places a strong emphasis on building communities and fostering interaction. Users can join or create servers based on their specific interests, hobbies, or fandoms. This allows young users to connect with like-minded individuals from around the world.

How Old Do You Need To Be To Use Discord

Users who are 13 years old and above can join the discord.  This age requirement complies with the Children’s Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA), a federal law in the United States that regulates the online collection of personal information from children under 13. 

How is Discord Different from Other Social Media Platforms

Discord is different from other social media platforms in several ways:

1. Discord is primarily designed as a communication platform, with a strong emphasis on voice, video, and text chat. It provides features like voice channels, private messaging, and group chat, making it popular among gamers, communities, and professional groups for real-time conversations.

2. Discord allows users to create or join serves as per specific topics, interests, or communities. Discord focuses on creating spaces where people with shared interests can gather, interact, and engage in discussions.

3. As per Discord, it focuses on users’ privacy and security. It provides the option to enable two-factor authentication, block or mute the users, and control servers and channels. 

Talking about the safety concerns, Senior Psychiatrist Kumkum Jagdish says “Like every other social media platform it is important to know why you are using the platform. Establishing clear boundaries, especially with discord is crucial as children get free access to connect with strangers.  Children of all ages are likely to encounter risks on the platform but children under 13 are more likely to be at risk because their emotional resilience is still developing and can affect the mental health of your child. Your child can get confused and may take up challenges that can harm them”. 

Potential Risks and Concerns 

While Discord offers numerous benefits, parents must be aware of potential risks and concerns associated with the platform. These include:

a. Inappropriate Content: Discord's openness and wide user base mean that users may encounter inappropriate content, including explicit language, discussions, or images. Parents should educate their children about responsible content consumption and encourage them to report any inappropriate material they encounter.

b. Privacy and Security: Like any online platform, Discord has its share of privacy and security concerns. Parents should emphasize the importance of protecting personal information, such as real names, addresses, and phone numbers, and teach their children to exercise caution when interacting with strangers online.

c. Cyberbullying and Harassment: Discord, like other social platforms, can be a breeding ground for cyberbullying and harassment. Parents should educate their children about the impact of their words and actions online, encourage open communication, and teach them how to deal with such situations effectively.

d. External Links and Downloads: Users can share links and files on Discord, which may pose a risk if they lead to malicious websites or contain harmful files. Parents should advise their children to be cautious when clicking on unfamiliar links or downloading files from unknown sources. 

Decoding the Gaming Ecosystem 

Over the past few years, the gaming industry has emerged and evolved significantly making India the second largest gamer industry in the world with 396.4 million gamers. 

With the advancement of technology, the gaming industry has seen a significant transformation. The stay-at-home during the lockdown compelled people to find their source of entertainment in virtual games and this resulted in a significant increase in the popularity of online multiplayer games, such as PUBG and Call of Duty, which fostered a strong gaming community.

The rise of micro-influencers in the gaming industry has been prominent in India. These individuals, with a smaller but highly engaged following, have leveraged platforms like YouTube and Twitch to live stream their gaming sessions.

Thus, with the ongoing trend in the gaming industry, Discord, a communication platform designed for gamers, witnessed huge popularity in India especially among teens and tweens. It provided gamers with a dedicated space to connect, communicate, and collaborate with other players. But if Discord is so popular why there is still a lack of awareness among many parents? 

Discord and Parents: What every parent should know about 

Mr. Praveen Rao father of a teen says, “ Emerged during the pandemic time, Discord became extremely popular among teens and tweens, and just like every other platform Discord has its pros and cons too. It provides certain advantages and the most important one is you get the chance to create your own servers and communities as per your interests. The anonymity factor on Discord where you don’t declare your real is also another feature that makes it popular. But Discord is not like WhatsApp or Facebook where you easily understand the features. It is quite complex and thus it is not much popular among parents even if they understood they found it too tricky".

What do Experts have to say about this?

You need to understand your child’s mindset. Yes, your child is curious, and s/he has her own world, where s/he can imagine a World of wonder. Try and remember your own childhood and you would see how you were also curious and full of wonder. For example, I loved Comics as a child and would just completely disappear in that comic World and live almost with the characters of the comics. So, it’s bound to happen. But then it’s true that online games and platforms like Discord can have downsides for a child who’s getting into an unsafe territory without even knowing so. So, what can you do and when? The time is now, the earlier the better. Start with the assumption that your child may already be on Discord or a similar online gaming platform, which you can’t find him on unless s/he lets you. Start with an open conversation, share what is making you worried, and share the incidents you have come to know and the dark side of such spaces. Talk openly about what is unsafe and how can your child stay safe. Make sure you build a common understanding about this with your child. Be on the same page and ensure that your child is wise to filter and more importantly knows how to stay safe. Moreover, build trust for your child to share the user i.d. or alias with the passwords. Be with your child on this journey, if the journey has already begun. Assume it has. Talk to your child today. - Nitin Pandey, Founder of Parentune

How Can you keep your child safe on Discord

1. Familiarize Yourself: Parents should take the time to understand how Discord works, including its features, privacy settings, and moderation tools. This will enable them to better monitor their child's activities and address any concerns. 

2. Safety Settings: Discord provides various privacy and safety settings. Parents can enable features like two-factor authentication, content filtering, and privacy settings to restrict who can contact their child and what content they can access.

3. Monitor Friend Requests: Encourage your child to only accept friend requests from people they know in real life. Regularly review their friend list and discuss any unfamiliar names or contacts. Adding more on how parents can monitor and manage their child’s activities on Discord, Kumkum says, “ Have a chat with your child, ask your child to explain what Discord is and how it functions. Open and honest conversation is the key. Discuss the internet safety issues and risks associated with interacting with strangers online.  Set Up Parental Controls and boundaries with your child.” 

4. Encourage Open Communication: Establish a trusting relationship with your child and encourage them to share their Discord experiences with you. Create an environment where they feel comfortable discussing any issues or encounters they have had on the platform. “Have regular conversations with your child about their experiences on Discord. Ask them about the communities they are involved in, the people they interact with, and any concerns or issues they might have encountered. Alert your child to not share any private information, account details, or any password online”, says Mr. Praveen Rao 

5. Teach Online Safety: Educate your child about the importance of online safety, including topics like protecting personal information, not sharing passwords, and being cautious when interacting with strangers. Reinforce the concept of responsible digital citizenship.

6. Review Server Memberships Regularly: Encourage your child to join safe and age-appropriate servers. Periodically review the servers they are part of and discuss their purpose and content. Consider removing them from any servers that may be inappropriate or raise concerns.

7. Stay Informed: Stay updated on the latest trends, features, and risks associated with Discord and other online platforms. Be proactive in seeking information about online safety and regularly communicate with your child about responsible internet usage. 

“Laptops became necessary especially during the pandemic so taking away the devices was not an option. But when he started using Apps, as a parent I became very curious about the fact that I wanted to know what he was doing on these apps. I made a rule that whatever he was using, I needed to have the credentials. I needed to know what he’s doing and I think it is very important that we draw certain boundaries and have on-ground rules. To understand what Discord is, even I created my account just to know what actually happens and to see if my child is doing the right thing or not”, Says Mr. Praveen Rao.

The best way to stay protected as a parent is to set boundaries together with your child. The internet itself poses innumerable risks, so it's important to be vigilant in how your child uses it—all the while making sure you don't cross over into "helicopter parenting" territory. By establishing healthy boundaries in advance, you can mitigate against games with poor parental controls or no parental controls at all. Keep hardware like computers and mobile phones in public areas of your home. Make use of filters and monitoring software and only give remote access, if really necessary. That way, you have a better shot at knowing what your child is doing online. And don’t hesitate to talk about anything questionable with your child. It's better to start a conversation and come to an understanding than it is to point fingers later on and make assumptions based on outcomes. Parenting is not about being an ideal parent, if it is anything, then it is about doing better as a parent every day. So, as technology advances continue and more online games keep emerging, so would you continue to learn to ensure your child’s safety online.