Why Choose Motherhood over Career?

Who decides what is fair? Or unfair? “How to balance Motherhood versus Career?” this dilemma has plagued all working women who have dared to aspire for a career along with the desire to fulfill their maternal instinct. It is not easy to choose one over the other; there is no black or white in this case. Women have been walking the tight rope trying to balance, career and motherhood and unfortunately will continue to do so even in the coming times. So it would be unfair for me to trounce one over the other, as both are important aspects of a working woman’s life.

I remember, several years back I quit my career as an aspiring banker to become a full-time mother. I did not think a maid could do justice in bringing up our child. However, the prospect of giving up my career was something I did not relish. But an extremely supportive mother-in-law saved me from this moral dilemma. She sacrificed her few remaining years as a school teacher to look after our son. If she had not, probably I would have been a stay at home mother, doing an equally critical career of raising a family.

What to Choose Motherhood or Career?

Times have changed; women are opting for higher studies versus an early out of college and married life. Likewise, jobs have become high pressure with more time spent at the workplace than the home.  Marriage goals have been pushed further back as career women are getting married around their early thirties or more.

At this point, a career woman is torn with familial obligations or her own maternal fulfillment. This is where it becomes very crucial to have an extremely supportive family system, which can share the important task of raising a child.

I feel we have no right to bring another human being in this world if we cannot be there with him or her during those critical growing up years. In the absence of the parents, a supportive family structure can help a career woman continue with her career goals.

However this is not a long term solution, sometimes a career takes a backseat as we definitely need to bond with our children and all that fancy talk of spending quality time is just a myth we have woven to assuage our guilt feelings.

Is Taking A Break the Solution?

Absolutely yes, I personally feel, take a break, be with your child as these moments of bonding that a mother shares will never come back. I have to date never regretted leaving a career that was fulfilling and gave me a sense of independence when I recall the pleasure in my son’s eyes when he would see me standing at the school gate to come to pick him up.

They grow up and the bond that we forge in those few years lasts a lifetime. You have the satisfaction and the happiness of being able to do both.

But then nothing in life is simple, we may want to give up our careers for motherhood, but circumstances like financial constraints force us to continue with our careers, however much we are pained. At the end of the day, fulfilling physical needs of our family take precedence over the mental well-being. [Read - What to Choose - Stay at Home or Working Mom?]

Lastly, a woman is not some scheming human being if she does decide to give her career precedence over her being a mother. At least she is being fair to her career and to her own self. She has the courage to say she can’t be responsible for another life, which is the right thing that she is doing.

So women please be honest and do the right choice for we are nurturers to a new set of progeny and that is a hell of an important task.