#HimforHer 6 Women On How Men Can Become Better Parenting Allies

For Women’s Day, we wanted to highlight if there is an unfair expectation from mothers in raising a child. From the moment a child is born, the invisible burden of the child’s well being falls on the mother. While most fathers love their child and their spouse, are they able to contribute to parenting  responsibilities equally? Why are women not receiving the help they are seeking as a parent and how can that be changed? How can #himforher change from a concept to reality?

They say the days of rigid gender roles dictating parenting responsibilities are gone. But are they, really? This 2020 article by The New York Times highlights how men like the idea of gender equality but fare poorly when it comes to sharing household work. So, when does our new narrative start? One where men step into the realm of caregiving, not as mere participants, but as active allies.

We asked 6 women from different walks of life on how men can be better allies in their parenting journey. Here’s what they said.

1.Roshni Bhatia - Popular content creator and mother to a 15 year-old

“While women could be born with the ‘maternal instinct’, parenting is something that we learn on the job. So, helping us take some pressures off motherhood and supporting us in our victories and fallouts is the best form of support a partner can lend to us.”

2. Dr Pallavi Rao Chaturvedi - Parenting Coach and mother of two

Gone are the days when going to work was the dad’s duty and taking care of the kid at home was the mum’s duty. Fathers need to realise that they need to equally pitch in with kids and home and mothers need to realise that they are not asking the dad for a favour when they are called on to do parental duties. This sends the right signals to kids. Little boys realise that they also need to contribute to the home front when they grow up and girls also realise that it is possible to manage, home, kids and work.

3. Ronita Sharma - Casting Agent/Producer and mother to a 2 year-old

Men should be equally responsible in changing diapers, bathing a child, reading them a story, taking the child out to the park, putting them to bed and if need be wake up in the middle of the night and comfort them. Mothers need time off. They need to be happy first to raise a happy child at home. So to all the men out there - a child is an equal responsibility of a father too. So wake up and share every responsibility that your wife has and make sure she is happy. Let the mama rest, sleep, party and chill too!

4. Kamana Gautam - Sustainable parenting champion and mother of two

“Men need to be more emotionally present towards their partner. Nobody is a born parent - just like us, men should equip themselves with more resources on parenting and work towards removing any conditioning that stops them from being an equal partner in raising the child. Additionally, they should be open to learning, divide chores equally and communicate with their partner.”

5. Dr Ammara Azmi - Dental Surgeon and mother to a 6 year-old

“Men can support women in their parenting journey by not judging them and believing that she can do and take care of her kids better than any person in the world.”

6. Saba Ladha - Content Writer and mother of four

“Men can be great allies by just acknowledging the fact that women are giving more than their best in their parenting journey. Even if they just appreciate her efforts, applaud her, thank her, women will love them for this! Also, the basic act of offering to help will be appreciated since it’s a forgotten tradition.”

These women echo a common sentiment: the need for men to actively engage in parenting duties. While progress towards gender equality in parenting has been made, there's still work to be done. By being emotionally present, sharing responsibilities and being a strong support system, men can contribute to creating a more equitable and supportive parenting environment. It's time for a new narrative  - it’s time for #himforher.